Gotta be

I lay my heart open
Thread bare
Holding nothing back
Vulnerable
Go ahead
Hit me again
...
Desperation
Weakness
Neither of which are ok
Ok in general
Just not ok for me
By me
For me
Of me
Neediness
Gotta be strong
Strong for me
Strong for everyone else
Not strong enough
Gotta be
Gotta be there for everyone else
Busy helping
Everyone
Never enough time
To look in the mirror
And realize you hate what you see
Never quite knowing
How to ask for help
Nor how to solve the problem
A flood of tears
Hiding behind a dam of glass
Held together by grass and thread.